Ahhh, isn't it great when your Monday is really like a Thursday? And what a wonderful Monday it is! Ducks won 47-14---Huskies lose 56-14. My fantasy football team is also slamming my opponent, Rick Carman, like a friggin' toilet seat, 37.2 - 5. It was nice to be back at Autzen Stadium on a somewhat wet and gloomy Saturday afternoon. I managed to get drunk enough to enjoy a pretty boring football game, but not enough to embarrass my parents and their friends to the point where I'd get cut out of their will (The day that happens, is the day I put them in a home). The score indicates that the Ducks pounded the Grizzlies and executed their offense and defense flawlessly. However, I don't think we gained more than 80 yards on the ground and looked more confused than a blind man in an orgy when we got inside the red zone. The new kicker for the ducks, Paul Martinez, has been a breath of fresh air. He already has 11 field goals in only 2 games! Before the season started, I thought that if we ever had to send the field goal unit (ha ha ha....I said "unit"...ha ha ha) onto the field, the result for the ducks would be like running backwards, naked through a cornfield. In the past few seasons, he used to be a punter for the ducks--and a shaky one at that. I was terrified to hear that he would be taking on the kicking duties for Oregon this year. He has proven me wrong though, and I am beginning to realize that some Mexicans might not be that bad (Kidding!). However, the bottom line is that we looked very poor and unorganized offensively against a borderline Special Olympics football team and I am scared sh*tless for our next two upcoming games against Fresno State and USC.

On a side note, I'd like to give a special thanks to Zach for not being a moron and wearing OSU apperal to the game like he said he would. We tailgated with a former U of O offensive lineman who is about 6'5", 330lbs where Zach is about 6ft, 130lbs...I don't care how much military training you've had...By the end of that fight, it would have been Zach standing on a box, naked with a hood over his head and jumper cables attatched to his unmentionables, with me squatting down giving the thumbs up to the camera.

After the first week of fantasy football, I will be 1-0 with a commanding victory. Not bad for a team led by Kerry Collins, who struggled with alcoholism earlier in his career and is throwing to Randy Moss who will undoubtedly be suspended at least once this year for violating the league's substance abuse policy. My running back, LaDanian Tomlinson, scored his 13th straight rushing touchdown, tying an NFL record. And holy sh*t, Zach...Indianapolis' defense scored! That's all you, dawg.

Tomorrow is my last day here...I will miss everyone...They've taught me so much!